Was just checking out these personals and they sound pretty decent. You got the run of the mill guy that wants to poop on someone, the Scooter Boot guy that frankly scares me a little more than poop guy, the lady who wants a guy that lays in bed all day. You got the guy who wants to do golden showers under the golden arches while watching the Golden Girls. It's like the Wizard of Oz, everyone is here! My name is Shane and I don't have any crazy quirks. "Oh, that's what they all say!" Yeah, I can hear your mom now. No, pretty norm-ish. I'm 32 and single, never been married. My favorite color is green. I'm a Virgo. I work in sales and graduated with a degree in Psychology. I had a pretty good stint with World of Warcraft in my twenties and so that may have delayed my relationship maturity, but I had a few short running girlfriends. I talk to my mom weekly, we're buds. I like to hike, bike, camp, go on spontaneous trips, play Words with friends, go to comedy clubs, eat all kinds of ethnic foods. Yeah, so that's me in a nutshell.
So now tell me about you, but before you do...one question...
Can I shit on you?
Okay, so I'm that guy from the earlier ad, I just didn't get the overwhelming response I thought I was going to get (just a Harry Potter impersonator and a heavy set BBW tranny, sorry, I'm kind of picky about who I poop on). I felt I needed to write a less formal ad and hopefully get your guard down so you could cozy up to the idea of my butt on your chest, face and possibly poop directly into your butt (we can talk about it, I'm a great communicator). We can even role play like I'm not going to poop on/in you, we don't even have to talk about it.
Call me, let's get wasted.
A writer living in Portland, OR looking to meet Chuck Palahniuk. Single mom to 2 boys, sales agent and lawyer-in-training.